Dear Old Navy employee,
Greetings and a heartfelt salutations to you. You may remember me from a bit earlier today as I stood out quite a bit. While everyone else visiting the Old Navy today was interested in trying on armfuls of brightly colored dresses, I was the gentleman who wanted to try on a single pair of sensible dark blue slacks.
I want to start by saying I do not have any qualms about the service that I received while visiting your dressing room. You did an excellent job. For instance, I thought it was an example of great customer service the way you knocked on the door of the dressing room before opening it and letting me in. You were very courteous and made sure that, after my session of trying on unfamiliar pants, that those pants were what I was looking for. Then, when they were not, the way you politely took them from me was masterful.
No, the reason I am writing you has nothing to do with your work ethic itself. It has more to do with an article of clothing you were wearing. Now, I know the Old Navy is a casual work environment, so I was not expecting you to wear a pantsuit or some sort of cocktail dress. The fact that you were wearing a t-shirt with a humorous slogan on the front was very fitting to your work situation. It has more to do with the slogan on the shirt itself.
Take your time. I get paid hourly.
I do want to offer up a hardy kudos to you for choosing a very honest shirt. This was not one of those humorous t-shirts that make me think you are attempting to be ironic with your shirt choice. You are, in fact, paid hourly. Your shirt was simply expressing the situation you find yourself currently in.
However, it seems to me that at a job, this would probably not be the best clothing option. Now, I am no expert on what is and is not the finest idea in the workplace, but I would guess that this message is probably not exactly what you would like to convey to your boss. Everyone wants their boss to think they are working very hard, so a shirt that seems to say, “The longer you take, the more money I get,” does not help you further your career at the Old Navy.
It would be different, I suppose, if this was a product your store was selling. In that scenario, you are just representing the company. Then your bosses would see you wearing that and instead of seeing a money-hungry slacker, they would see an employee exemplifying the attitude of the company by showcasing some of the sassier wear that is available to customers.
After a search on your website, though, I found out this was not an Old Navy shirt at all. That means that you had worn a foreign t-shirt into work and it happened to be a t-shirt that seems to imply that you are not too concerned with getting a great deal done.
Maybe I am thinking about this all wrong. After all, the shirt was saying that there was no rush for me to hurry. Perhaps it is actually excellent customer service, letting the consumer know that they do not need to rush as you will be getting paid the same amount either way. Looking at it that way, it seems to be a good choice, I suppose.
On the off-chance you think your bosses might not approve, though, I would recommend not wearing that t-shirt again. Instead, I have written a new slogan for you to have emblazoned on a shirt that might show your bosses just how hard you want to work.
Could you hurry? I get paid hourly and I would like to jam as much work as I can into the hour so that, at the end of the day, I can say that I really gave it my all for the company that signs my paychecks.
Sure, it may be wordy, but I think you will find the extra words were worth it when you get a well-deserved $0.50 per hour raise.