Note: I realize that some of the information here may not be accurate. However, if you correct me on any of it, I will call you a nerd and make fun of you. Everyone will be pointing and laughing and making jokes about your inability to talk to the opposite gender.
Now on to a post about comic books.
It’s a tale as old as time. Girl meets man. Man turns out to be an alien from another planet. Girl loves alien from another planet and alien loves girl back. Also, alien pretends to be another completely separate person. Girl ignores the man who alien is pretending to be and loves the man alien actually is. Then alien leaves girl for more powerful girl from a mysterious island in Greece.
I think we can all say this plot has become just a bit cliché.
Since 1938, Lois Lane has had a very complicated relationship with Superman. Somehow, Lois always ended up being in some sort of trouble. Then a mysterious man in tights and a cape that would fly in (yes, I mean fly) and save her. She had no idea who this was, though he sort of looked like her coworker Clark, although his lack of glasses and slightly different hair meant they were obviously not the same person. Whoever this man was, this situation played out over and over. Lois apparently was not great at identifying danger.
As is prone to happen, Lois began to develop feelings for this Superman. Maybe it was his brazen confidence that attracted her to him. He was, after all, confident enough to wear underwear outside of his pants. Most likely, though, it was due to his consistent saving of her life. Chicks tend to dig that kind of thing.
Then, all of a sudden, there are pictures. It seems that the man who Lois has pined after all this time has moved on to some other brazen hussy who walks around in a corset and knee-high boots.
Superman has become romantically entangled with Wonder Woman.
Now, we should have seen this coming. I mean, relationships are built on trust. I am not too sure how most people define trust, but having two separate identities that you never tell a person about is not a great way to build trust in a relationship. Also, I have it on good authority that Superman never puts the seat down, so that is another huge minus in the relationship arena.
Still, though, this had to have come as a shock to Lois. After spending the better part of 74 years pursuing this mysterious alien, suddenly he has left for greener pastures.
Really, who can blame Superman. Wonder Woman has an invisible jet which would be appealing to many people. Also, they could have great kids together. You think Michael Phelps is a great Olympian, wait until their progeny get into the pool.
Still, though, I feel that Superman has not thought this out very well. For one, he cannot even sort of fib to Wonder Woman:
“Kal-El, did you take out the trash?”
“I was just about to do that…”
“Were you really?”
“Yeah. Of course, dear.”
“Do I need to get the lasso of truth out?”
Suddenly, Superman’s freedom has been taken away from him.
Lois could do much better than Superman anyway. Sure, he can fly and has heat rays that come out of his eyes and he is incredibly strong and all of that, but he would always be ducking into nearby phone booths or other small areas. Imagine having a date with him. You know he would have run off into some closet before the spinach-artichoke dip even arrived.
I hope that someday Lois can find true love. Maybe with Aquaman, though that would probably mean she could never have seafood again. He would be whining about how you are eating his friends and, no doubt, would get very upset.
Aquaman can be a baby like that.
- Lois Lane “In Terrible Mood” Over Superman and Wonder Woman Hook-Up, Eats Ice-Cream (geek-news.mtv.com)
- Case of the Ex: Lois Lane on Superman and Wonder Woman’s hookup (popwatch.ew.com)
- Superman and Wonder Woman to Get it On (ign.com)